Rachel had initially reached out to me upon my first announcement that Restoring Humanity was in the works. While I hadn’t gotten a chance to meet up with her for an interview, I received this message in my inbox just a few nights ago.
I remember you posted that you are working on a project to document the struggles of recent grads. When you posted that, I kind of hoped my luck in finding a job and moving out would get better, but unfortunately, it didn’t and it prompted me to write to you in case you wanted to use my experience in your project. I’ll send you my thoughts if you’re interested.
The phrase, “Be kind for everyone you know is fighting a hard battle,” opened my eyes to the unspoken about, unaddressed battle we all face – the internal. Can you tell me your current, greatest battle you must face?
“This past year has been filled with two significant internal battles for me. The first was getting out of an emotionally abusive on and off relationship once and for all. It was difficult to align my head and my heart because internally I knew I shouldn’t tolerate what went on anymore, but I couldn’t let go of my feelings for the guy. It put me in a really deep depression for a long time, which is something I had never experienced or understood before. While dealing with that, I also came to realize that I needed to figure out what I was going to career-wise, so I could live independently and keep myself busy. I’d say that while I have come out of the depression, I still feel unworthy in many aspects of my life because of the constant rejection I’ve faced in the last few months/years.”
What brings you happiness?
“I’m trying to meet as many people as possible. I’ve found that although I can be conscious at times, I am at my happiest when I’m with friends and meeting new people. I’ve made more of an effort to get out of bed each day and instead get out there and do and see as much as I can.”
If you had no limitations at all, what would you be doing with your life?
“I would spend a few years traveling and living in different countries. I’m lucky in that I’ve already been able to travel somewhat, but it really is so expensive. I wish everyone was able to do it as frequently as they wished.”
In what ways are you working to fill the void you’ve been experiencing?
“I go to therapy to talk out my issues and feelings of being lost, and I try to remind myself that everyone puts their pants on one leg at a time each day – so I shouldn’t feel so low or conscious about things.”
What advice do you have for everyone seeking to answer the same questions as you?
“One of my tattoos is a simple up and down arrow, which I got after going through a rough time and then having other good opportunities open up for me. To me, it is a constant reminder that while life can bring you down sometimes, it will always turn back up when you least expect it. So even though things might be really shitty for whatever reason, you just need to have faith that if you take the necessary steps, you can pull yourself back up and good things will eventually come your way.”